Sunday, October 28, 2007

Yahoo is up

I like stock trading. It's a lot like vegas, except for the lack of free drinks, half-naked waitresses, comps, etc.....

So I like gambling I guess.

I've got an interview lined up with Microsoft to join their Exchange crit-sit team. I think I'm qualified, just need to prove that to them I guess. It involves a relo, which depending on how Microsoft does relocations, might make the whole thing irrelevant. We're not quite upside-down in this house, but we're not making much progress either.

We'll see I guess.

Looks like mom qualifies for some special program that will keep her out of prison for her 2 felonies. Some sort of "I'll narc on everyone I know and do drug rehab" program. She'll be on probation for a bit, so thats that I guess.

No real news on the dad front of late.

I've been playing guild wars lately, because its online but free. It does it for me as far as a fantasy fix goes.

Monday, October 15, 2007

I just bought 200 shares of Yahoo - wish me luck

A lot of analysts are saying it's going to go down. I don't know, we'll see. They have a shit load of cash. New CEO, earnings report in the morning.

My psychiatrist said to keep a log of my dreams when I wake from them since they are so frequent. All I recall is waking up being disoriented and confused.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

I should update the title of this thing.

I don't know, no political tripe in here so far. I'm too depressed to think how we let our country be run.

I'm tired. Do I say that too much? It's a quarter till nine. The kids were really a handful today.

I think I feel asleep sitting up in the playroom today.

I've sold some of my excess computer stuff on ebay. Wohoo.

There's a big lizard in my backyard

So, here I am. Waking up at 5:30 AM on a Sunday morning.

I used to go to church. I used to have an unshakable faith in God. That's starting to develop some cracks I think. Crumble around the edges. Showing signs of stress fractures. I'd really like to find a Buddhist temple somewhere to visit on a regular basis, get the feel for it. But the suburbs aren't exactly teeming with spiritual seekers I guess.

The closest is a journey to Decatur. Where I do know people, so it would be a dual-pronged mission, but alas, kids and wife keep me from such pursuits these days.

Saturday, October 13, 2007

No rest for the wicked

I've been sleeping for 3-4 hours a night, waking in the middle of the night, staying up for a couple hours, then going back to bed for 45 minutes or so before its time to go to work.

Not on purpose or anything, its just whats been happening.

Work has been tremendously busy lately. One of my co-workers is having panic attacks its getting so bad. I don't blame him really. We're totally understaffed. It's a well paying stressful job.

Hopefully I won't be doing it much longer.

I don't know, part of me will miss it I guess, its pretty fast paced. But whatever.

My mother has been arrested for felony distribution, she's looking at prison/jail time, then the state trial will be after the federal one, might have some more time there.

My suicidal thoughts haven't been so bad lately. I think the meds are starting to take hold. wohoo.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

God I'm tired

These last few days at work have been exhausting. I'm juggling a lot of projects at once and a few of them are all very active at once. It's been hectic.

I'm tired. Been getting 3-5 hours of sleep a night or so.

Friday, September 28, 2007

I'm just waiting on a plane.

I'm getting ready to make a career change.

Seems strange. I sort of stumbled into IT by accident. My father sort of stunted my curiosity in computers when he got mad at me all the time for spending time indoors trying to program my TI-99-4/A and then my commodore 64.

I could never understand him. Why buy me stuff like that and then limit the time I spend on it? He was always forcing me in to playing sports. I played baseball, a sport I personally despise and always have, for four or five years.

Enough about him.

So I'm doing a career change. For the first time in fifteen years I'll have a non-technical job. I've been wanting to make the transition somehow for a long time now, four or five years. I had hoped my company would grow and expand and I could spend time managing it instead of doing primary technical stuff for it.

I just want a break. Unfortunately, companies don't really grant sabbaticals. I'd love a year or two off to go do something else. Take a sanity break.

But this new job, if I get it, won't be technical really. I'll babysit enterprise class customers, making sure they get the support they need and whatnot. It's a 24/7 job. You are always on-call, but you don't go in (in fact you work from home). I'm a little worried that it won't work out, because it's something new. But it's a dream job as far as I see it.

Well, it isn't working for Google as a site manager, but we all know how that turned out.

So anyway, hopefully soon I'll be doing non-technical work and be in pretty much the same pay-range as before.

I'm sort of treating this like getting married. I'm realising that the only reason I have not to take this job is the fear of it not working out. Can't let that stop you in life.

I've been getting tired of technology. Things at this point in my career are either simplisticly easy or extremely tedious. There is very little fun left in the work at this point. I'm good at what I do, and I'm thankful that I have this ability to pick things up. But I'm bored with computers at this point. Maybe this career change will be a huge disaster and I'll move back into IT again just for the money, after realising how good I had it.

Or maybe not.

I've had a lot of dreams about my parents on this trip. Stuff that wakes me up after a scene is over. Very intense.

A manager at my work told me he was keeping my mother in his prayers because of her stroke. I wanted to tell him that she doesn't deserve it, that she brought this on herself and all that. But I can't figure out a polite way to say it all without sounding like a complete dick. So I've graciously thanked him for his concern instead.

I guess that's a politically savvy move there.

I sent my daughter a book while I was on this trip. Fedex'd it to her so she would get it while I was gone. It was really cute to hear her talk about it. Me getting a package is a tedious thing at this point in my life. For her it was an adventure. Her comments went something like this "Yes, we were cleaning my car outside and the mailman came and gave me the book. It's about a band. We read it."

She really can pull off long sentences that suprise me sometimes. Pretty sophisciated for a three year old I think. I guess some of my appraisal of her ability is clouded by being her father. But whatever.

So anyway, my son can speak pretty well on the phone too now. Not bad for a 18 month old. When I call I can hear him saying da-da in the background. He must be pissed when it isn't me on the other end of that phone.

Well, enough about this stuff. Time to get ready to hop onto this big ole jet hairdryer.